New York Pathways relationship restoration process is not couples therapy. A relationship affected by sex addiction has been badly damaged. Couples often come to New York Pathways having lost all trust and having no effective means of communication. They are filled with despair and feel emotionally unsafe. Sex addiction fills a relationship with secrets, shame, anger, resentment, and mistrust. “Gaslighting” is common in a relationship marred by sex addiction, causing intense confusion. Couples feel hopeless. Efforts to change the other person’s behavior have gotten nowhere, often causing more despair, anger, and hopelessness. Under these circumstances, couples therapy is fruitless. Many couples have tried couples therapy for these issues, and it hardly ever works.
For many years, New York Pathways has been guiding couples through what we call relationship restoration using a conjoint therapy process. In this process, both you and your partner will be assigned a therapist, and you will each be working on your own individual treatment plan. In addition, the “couple” will be given a treatment plan that is specifically geared toward restoring hope, trust, and intimacy into the relationship. It’s not about going back to your old, broken relationship – it’s about building a new healthy and honest one.
The goal of relationship restoration is breaking through the secrecy. There will be an end to lies and secrets. The old relationship has been destroyed by secrets, lies, deception, half-truths, and the unimaginable trauma of the discovery of a secret life. The couple will understand the impact of the addict’s behavior, have clear boundaries going forward, and the process will culminate with accountability and emotional restitution.
The relationship restoration process usually takes 6 months to a year. After completion, each member of the couple is encouraged to continue his or her own individual growth in treatment and to attend couples therapy to continue to hone and refine everything learned during the relationship restoration process.